Kenny's Answer
by PizzaCatDavid
Summary: RATED 15 and Over: Contains swearing, some strong. Kenny is fed up being poor and killed, so he tries to get answers from God...who doesn't seem to be answering him...untill...
1. Chapter 1

**Kenny's Answer**

**NOTE: I do not own any of the characters in this story, except the story itself.**

**NOTE 2: Kenny doesn't muffle in this story as I'll get fed up writing "mmppfff mpff mmmpfffhh" That'll annoy me, she he'll be talking...if you've got a problem with that then please don't bother reading on.**

Kenny was plugging his TV and VHS recorder, it was a tascky TV with a wooden finish, the TV must've been over twenty years old, as is the recorder. Kenny smiled through his orange parker and went to get some food. He went in the kitchin and pushed a stool against the counter and climbed on top to open a cupboard and then pulled out a packet of crips (Chips), which was already opened. Kenny climbed off the counter and went to another cupboard and pulled out a dirty stained bowl, which was slight cracked but his didn't seemed to phase him. He went back to the living room and poured the crips into a bowl and a rat ran out and ran into a hole in the wall and yet Kenny didn't seem to mind. He then tried one of the crips and munched on it, it was a little soft but the favour of cheese and onion could still be tasted. Kenny sat back into the sofa and started drinking from his very cheap warm coke.

About ten minutes later, the doorbell went but it seemed to finish halfway through it's jingle but it was long enough for Kenny to go to the front door. Kenny opened door to see Cartman looking angrily at him.

"God, you suck ass, Kenny..." said Cartman, making his way into the house. "Why the hell do we have to watch this film at your house, Kenny? It smells and it's crappy and my house has a fridge..."

"I have a fridge!" said Kenny.

"Yeah but my fridge is full of food..." said Cartman, deadpanly

Kenny just looks at Cartman angrily but descides to change the subject quickly.

"Did you bring the film?" asks Kenny.

"Yeah, yeah...I did!" said Cartman.

Cartman shows himself to the living room and see's the food on the table, Kenny follows him.

"Crisp...?" said Cartman. "Haven't you got any cheesy poofs, man?"

"No..."

"God damn it, Kenny...oh well, I guess is better than starving to death" Kenny frowns at Cartman. Cartman pulls something out of his pocket. "Here, I've got a DVD of 'Bound'..."

Kenny just looks at Cartman, slightly confused. "A what...?"

"Huh? What do you mean 'A what?' It's a DVD, Kenny, just put it in your DVD player".

"I thought you was bringing in a tape?" said Kenny.

"A tape? Why the hell would I bring in a tape, Kenny? Get with the times, man, Jesus..."

"I don't have a DVD player, nor do I have any DVD's...I've just got this VHS player...but it's new, we've only had it for about ten years..."

"No...DVD player...?" asked Cartman, looking shocked. "Kenny, I know your family is poor but...surely you can afford a DVD player? It's what every family have...even Jews...like Kyle's family...your family must really suck if they can't afford a DVD Player. You have a crap house, a crap garden, a crap bedroom, crap food and other crap stuff because your poor...very poor. In that case why don't I take this DVD film back to my house, watch it and eat cheesy poofs, while you can stay here and watch the flies fly around that stain in he corner. Have fun!"

Cartman puts the DVD film back in his pocket and shows himself to the door. Kenny was upset, he sighs sadly and goes over to pull the plug out of the socket to turn the telly off but instead gets electricuted but the water dripping into the live plugs. Kenny's body felt the current quickly go through him and then his eyes became dark and his heart took it's last beat and it stopped, the TV next to Kenny explodes because of the fuse, the screen cracks and smoke comes out of the TV. Kenny stopped shaking from the electric current and was lifeless. Kenny's dad quicky comes in and see's his lifeless son next to the TV. Kenny's dad rushes over and kneels down.

"OH MY GOD!!" Shouted Kenny's dad. "YOU DESTROYED MY TV!! YOU BASTARD!!"

Kenny's dad starts crying, mourning the death of the TV.


	2. Chapter 2

**Kenny's Answer**

**NOTE: I do not own any of the characters in this story, except the story itself.**

**NOTE 2: Kenny doesn't muffle in this story as I'll get fed up writing "mmppfff mpff mmmpfffhh" That'll annoy me, she he'll be talking...if you've got a problem with that then please don't bother reading on.**

It was the next day in South Park. Stan and Kyle were waiting at the bus stop.

"Dude, did you see that CSI last night?" asked Stan

"Yeah, dude, I didn't understand a word they were saying!" said Kyle.

"Yeah, it was a little confusing..."

"They were wearing the same suit, were they cops or what?" asked Kyle.

Before Stan could reply, Cartman walked upto to them, with a angry expression on him. He then just stood next to Kyle and didn't say a word. Stan and Kyle looked at each other before looking back at Cartman.

"Hey, Cartman..." said Stan.

Cartman didn't reply but kept looking down at the snow.

"Soooo....how was your DVD night at Kenny's" asked Kyle.

"Don't say that asshole's name, you guys..." said Cartman.

"Why? What happened?" Asked Kyle, again.

"You guys, your not gonna believe this!" said Cartman, almost whispering. "It's Kenny...he's...poor..."

Stan and Kyle just look at him.

"We know..." said Stan.

"No, seriously, he's really poor, I mean REALLY poor!"

"Yeah, we know..." said Kyle.

Cartman looks at them, gobsmacked. "Are...are you guys for real? Don't you understand this?"

"Cartman, we already know Kenny's poor, YOU know Kenny's poor...his mum is a lazy whore and his dad is a drunk..." said Stan.

"But...but...he's really poor, he has no DVD player!!"

Stan and Kyle were in shock and couldn't find their words.

"No...DVD player...?" said Stan.

"God, no...this can't be happening...Kenny...doesn't have a DVD player...?" said Kyle, trying to keep his balance over the shock. "It...it can't be..."

"It's true, you guys....it's true!" said Cartman, sadly. "Kenny sucks ass!"

"No...all this time..." said Kyle.

Kenny saw the over three boys and was about to walk over to them but he overheard his name, he stopped in his tracks and then hid in a bush to get closer to them so they didn't know he was listening to them. Kenny listen really hard.

"All this time...all the time he spent with us...and he didn't have a-a DVD player...my God..." Continuted Kyle. "We treated him as one of us...and all this time he...(Starts crying) Oh Jesus..."

Kyle turns to Stan and cries in his shoulders. "I know, Kyle, I know...it's shock to me too...his family must really be poor...so poor he can't afford a DVD player...how...how can he live on...?"

"How can WE live on, guys...what about us...?" asked Cartman. "Well, that does it, from this day forward: Kenny is no longer our friend...he sucks, well he's always sucked but this is one major suck! Just because he's poor and poor people REALLY do suck, they suck, oh yes...they suck ass...! I think I've made my point..."

"Your right, Cartman, for once in your life your right...Kenny can...no longer be our friend..." said Stan, sadly, trying not to cry.

Kenny overheard this and his heart sank, he felt dry in the mouth and a huge dark cloud was forming over his head, he was depressed and for once in his life, he felt lonely. Kenny sighed and walked away slowly and out of sight so the three boys couldn't spot him.

At that point, the school bus arrived.

"We must tell everyone about Kenny, before he becomes someone else's friend!" said Cartman, climbing on bus and finding a seat.

"Dude, I can't believe Cartman didn't know that Kenny didn't have a DVD player" smiled Stan.

"Yeah, what a fat ass, we all know Kenny can't afford one" laughed Kyle.

"But do you think Cartman is going a little over the top with this DVD thing?" asked Stan. "I mean, not beings friends...Kenny is way better than Cartman..."

"Oh like anything else that Cartman has done, he'll just fed up with it..." said Kyle.

"Yeah" agreed Stan.

"GET ON THE BUS, SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP!!" Shouted Miss Crabtree.

"Dude, she is the worst character ever" said Stan.

"Totally..." said Kyle.

Stan and Kyle both got on the bus, the doors closed and went off to school.

Meanwhile Kenny was walking back to his house, depressed more than ever, he had heard his friends didn't want him around because of what he was. He kicked a stone and put his hands in his pockets. The dark cloud was still above him, getting slightly bigger.

"I wish I wasn't poor..." Mumbled Kenny. He kicked another stone.

Just then the cloud hovering above him was getting bigger and bigger, he looked up and saw his depression cloud creating lightening, he got worried and pulled his strings on his parker hood to make it tighter.

"Oh crap!" he said.

He started running but the cloud just kept following him and was striking lightening at him, it missed Kenny a few times before striking at Kenny's head and the current went through his body, Kenny screamed but then he stopped and all his body functions stopped and Kenny was dead. The cloud was still hovering above him.

A car went by with two guys in it and were in shock to see Kenny's dead body, the guy driving put on his brakes.

"Oh my God" said the first guy. "I think it's gonna rain!"

"Oh no..." said the second guy. Then the cloud just dissapeared like that. "Oh, wait a second, it was a depression cloud, over that dead kid!"

"Oh thank God, I thought it was gonna rain..." laughed the first guy.

"Me too" said the second, also laughing.

The first guy started up the car and drove off.

"I'd be depressed too, if I was a dead kid" laughed the guy.

The car was out of sight. Kenny's body just lied there, then some rats surrounded him.

(**Yes I know he died kinda the same way in the first chapter but it'll be different next time, I promise...fingers crossed lol)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Kenny's Answer**

**NOTE: I do not own any of the characters in this story, except the story itself.**

**NOTE 2: Kenny doesn't muffle in this story as I'll get fed up writing "mmppfff mpff mmmpfffhh" That'll annoy me, she he'll be talking...if you've got a problem with that then please don't bother reading on.**

It was a few days later. Kenny was lying in bed and the sun pierced through his window and beaming on his face. Kenny flinched and then woke up with the blinding light in his eyes. He sat up and rubbed his eyes and then looked out the window, it was a beautiful day in South Park but Kenny didn't think so...the last few days his friends were making fun out of him.

**FLASHBACK.**

Kenny was on the swings until Cartman brought a whole gang of school kids to him.

"You guys, you see him?! This is Kenny..." said Cartman.

"We know it's Kenny..." said Craig.

At this point, Kenny stops swinging as he was surrounded by Cartman's parade.

"Craig, where's your senses, man? This kid doesn't own a DVD player!!" said Cartman, not a care in the world.

Kenny got fed up, got off the swings and pushed his way out of the crowd.

"We know..." said Craig again.

"Don't you get it? Kenny the poor kid, doesn't have a DVD player...so he can't watch Transformers or...or Spiderman or Pearl Harbor...or or Epic Movie!!!" said Cartman, almost gasping.

"We don't care..." said Clyde.

"CLYDE!!" shouted Cartman, grabbing him and slapping his face. "Snap out of it man, your going crazy!"

"Ow" said Clyde, rubbing his cheeks.

Stan and Kyle arrived at the pointless scene.

"What's going on?" sighed Stan.

"I'm telling these people that Kenny is a third world country, he can't afford a DVD player. Kyle, your Jewish, aren't you?"

"Uh, yeah..." said Kyle, slightly confused.

"But you've got a DVD player...Stan has got one, I've got one and I'm not a Jew..." said Cartman.

"Cartman, all you need is mone-" said Stan before being interupted...

"And Clyde has got one and he's a dick!" continued Cartman.

Clyde looked at Cartman angrily. "Your a fucking retard!" said Clyde, walking off as did the other kids.

The crowd quicky seperates and all the kids spread around the playground and start playing their games.

"But you guys don't get it-"

"Cartman, what's the big deal, anyway? They have the same crap films on cable anyway, what is the different between that and DVD's?" asked Kyle.

Cartman paused, his mouth slightly opened and frowning at Kyle.

"DVD's have extra's, Kyle..." said Cartman. "DVD's have extra's..."

"Oh, up yours, tubby" said Kyle and walks off.

"What is everybody's problem?" shouted Cartman. "Everybody MUST have DVD players, it's the whole point of life!!"

Everybody just ignores him.

"God damn assholes..." whispered Cartman.

Kenny was walking around the snowy playground, his hands in his pocket and looking really glum.

What's so good about a DVD player, anyway...I'm happy with my black and white TV...still, everybody does have one...makes me feel left out...*Sigh*...I guess...I kinda...do wish I had one and watch those DVD films that I already have on tape...and those extras...they sound pretty cool...I wish I wasn't poor...why me? Is God just picking on me or something?

Kenny was near his classroom door and about to open the door.

Nah...God isn't cruel...

Just then Mr. Garrison slams the door open, smaking into Kenny and crushing him against the wall, in which his head cracked open and seemed to explode on impact with the wall. Kenny's body twitches before stopping and dying on the spot.

"Okay, children, playtime's over and please for the love of God, don't slam the door against the wall, it'll just ruin the paintwork, okay?" said Mr. Garrison.

Mr. Garrison then notices Kenny's dead body and blood all over the door and wall.

"Oh for Christ sake, see, this is what I'm talking about..." said Mr. Garrison, in a angry tone. "Kenny, you've got detention after school and don't think you can skip out like you did last time when you did this!"

**FLASHBACK ENDS.**

Kenny's sudden sadness quickly becomes anger.

"And what the fuck is with me dying?" said Kenny. "Why am I poor? Why do I die? That's because theirs no God, he's just a fake, like Teletubbies!! If he's real, then why doesn't he answer my prayers, why isn't he here when I need him. God damn him!! (Kenny looks upto his ceiling) IF YOUR REAL, ANSWER ME! ANSWER ME! I'M WAITING!! ANSWER ME!!

Just then, the ceiling collasped and a bath tub crashed through and landed on Kenny, crushing him to death. Kenny burst like a balloon. The dust died down slowly and it was Kenny's dad in the bath tub.

"Oh my God...Kenny was right, there was a crack in the floor..."


	4. Chapter 4

**Kenny's Answer**

**NOTE: I do not own any of the characters in this story, except the story itself.**

**NOTE 2: Kenny doesn't muffle in this story as I'll get fed up writing "mmppfff mpff mmmpfffhh" That'll annoy me, she he'll be talking...if you've got a problem with that then please don't bother reading on.**

**NOTE 3: WARNING This page contains strong language.**

**NOTE 4: For those who believe in God, I don't mean to offend, ok it is just a story, the views in this are not real. Get over it, it is just a fanfic, nothing more and nothing less.**

It was a beautiful Sunday morning but Kenny didn't see the beautiful sun beaming through his window or the clear blue sky, all he could see was another dull day ahead and the same old routine; the piss takes and death.

Kenny was lying in his bed, just staring at his cracked ceiling. His thoughts were just full of anger and questions that he'll never get answered. Kenny sighed but just stayed in bed, thinking that nothing will happen to him.

There was a knock on his door.

"Kenny? Are you changed yet?" asked his mum.

Kenny didn't answer.

"Kenny?" His mum opened the door and was puzzled to see him in bed. "Kenny, why aren't you changed yet? We have to get ready for church".

Kenny whinched when he heard that word, he sighed and said: "I'm not going!"

"What?"

"I said, I'm not going!" said Kenny, louder this time.

"You have to go to church, Kenny!" said his mum, angrily.

"Why?"

"Because if you don't, you'll go straight to hell, and God wouldn't want that!"

"But...that's stupid!" said Kenny. "Why would I go to hell, I've done nothing wrong!"

"We all have sins, Kenny, even me, I cheated on your dad with his brother, in front of his face, while watching Friends...and God hates Friends..."

"This sucks! Cartman's more evil than me and nothing happens to him. God is just picking on me!"

"Oh Kenny, God's not picking on you...now GET UP AND GET CHANGED!!!"

She pulled Kenny out and chucked him against the wall, and shoved him in his Sunday best.

"Come on, we're gonna be late!!"

And she dragged him all the way to the church.

It was half an hour later and Kenny was sitting in between his parents, looking fed up, the words coming out of the vicars mouth was just rable, going through one ear and out the other, Kenny's eyes were getting heavier, as he couldn't stand all this boring torture and hearing stuff he already knows about...but he heard a slight whisper behind him, he pricked up his ears and heard it was Cartman's voice, along with Stan.

"Hey, you guys...I know why Kenny's going to hell" whispered Cartman.

"Dude, we don't care..." said Stan.

"Because he's poor and has no DVD player...only heaven has DVD players..."

"THAT'S IT!!!" Shouted Kenny, the whole church looking towards him. Kenny then quickly turns and punches Cartman in the face, who falls off his seat, holding his nose.

"I AM SICK OF YOU, CARTMAN!! I'M GOD DAMN SICK OF YOU!!! IT SHOULD BE YOU BEING POOR!! NOT ME!! IT SHOULD BE YOU GETTING KILLED EVERYDAY!!! NOT ME!!!"

"For goodness sake, child...what is-...?" asked Rev. Maxie but before getting interrupted.

I AM SICK OF MY LIFE AND I'M SICK OF COMING HERE AND SPEECHES ABOUT GOING TO HELL AND HOW JESUS LOVES US AND...AND FUCKING GOD SAYING HE FORGIVES US ALL BUT STILL TREATS US LIKE SHIT!!!

"KENNY, SIT DOWN!" Shouted his mum.

"NO!! FUCK THIS SHIT!! FUCK THIS CHURCH!! AND FUCK GOD!!"

Kenny started to storm off, but the giant cross on the stand started to wobble (for no reason), and toppled over Kenny, squashing his body and breaking every bone, the blood spattered everywhere, to the shock of everybody. The only thing that was left that could be seen of Kenny, was his two arms sticking out of the cross, still twitching.

Everyone still looked in shock.

"OH MY GOD, KENNY, LOOK OUT!!" said Cartman.

"Dude, don't use the lords name in vein" whispered Stan.

"Oh God, sorry..." said Cartman, still holding his nose.

"You see...this is what happens, people, this is what happens when you don't own a DVD player!" said Rev Maxie.

Suddently, the whole place went white.

Kenny was asleep or so he thought, he opened his eyes and all he saw first was a white light, it blinded him at first but then his eyes got use to the brightness. He blinked a couple of times and noticed he was surround by clouds, it was beautiful, he never seen anything like it, it was peaceful and loving.

"Wow..." gasped Kenny. "It's...pretty cool..."

Kenny then reliesed he was dead but had never had the chance to experiance heaven before, if this is what it was...then it was plain and simple, just the way things should be.

Suddently, Kenny noticed the place getting dark and some of the clouds parting, it was as if day had before night and then saw a big shaped shadow...he turned around and couldn't believe at what he was seeing and he stepped back.

"Oh my...God...?" gasped Kenny.


	5. Chapter 5

**Kenny's Answer**

**NOTE: I do not own any of the characters in this story, except the story itself.**

**NOTE 2: God in South Park is this really weird monster creature but in my fic he is something that I believe we can relate too...or at least like.**

**NOTE 3: Please don't be offended as this is just a cheap-skate story, I can't stress this enough. If you do get offended you've got nothing to blame yourelf for reading this...**

Kenny couldn't believe it, he was staring at, until now only exsisted only in fiction and rumours and God was before him.

"Is...is ot really you...God...?" gasped Kenny.

"Yes, my son, I am before you..." said the can of Pepsi.

Kenny just stared at the person he was taught to believe in, still not believing what he was seeing. To Kenny he was just staring at a can of Pepsi, which was glowing a lovely peaceful white light glow. Kenny was gobsmacked, he didn't think God would be a Pepsi...though little things like that did make sence.

"What is wrong, my child?" asked God.

Kenny blinked and tried to becareful what to say.

"Uh...your a...Pepsi...?"

"Yes, that is right"

"A...can of Pepsi...?"

"Yes, well done" said God.

"But, your thousands of years old and...Pepsi wasn't invented till the early nineth century..."

"Well, of course not...that would be silly. When I created the world, I was water giving life to everything and everyone for seven days...except Adam and Eve, those thieving bastards...then soon I established and became wine for my son, Jesus, and then tea, coffee, Fosters and Sunny D...and now, before your eyes, I am Pepsi..."

"But...surly you was just one formed being?" asked Kenny.

"I have to get with the times, son!" said God, the can not flinching.

"Oh..."

"Shall we get to the matter on why your here?!" said God, sounding serious.

"Well, isn't it obivous? I'm dead! And I'm getting fed up with the lifestyle I'm living, it sucks! It really does suck! Everyday I'm bullied at school because I'm poor...and all the time I'm killed off! What the hell is the deal??"

"Son, do not swear in front of me!" said God.

"You said bastard a few moments ago!"

"I am God, I can say and do anything!"

"That's not fair, it's because of you that I'm fed up with my life! It's you that kills me off, it's you that make my family suffer! Why do you do that to me? It's not fair, it's not fair, IT'S NOT FAIR!!! YOUR USLESS GOD! I GO TO CHURCH EVERYDAY AND DO I GET ANY THANKS? NO, I DON'T GET ANY GOOD OUT OF IT!!! THAT FAT PIECE OF CRAP CARTMAN GETS EVERYTHING!! WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE DVD PLAYERS AND NOT ME!!! YOUR JUST CRAP AND A WASTE OF TIME!!!"

Kenny was starting to go red with anger before he finished his rant and God, as calm as he is, just listened to Kenny. Kenny was near to tears before he fell to his knees. Kenny had finished what he said and felt slightly better for letting out his anger from his system. God didn't flinch and was ready to have his say now that Kenny was finished.

"My son...stand up...!"

Kenny heard this, at first he didn't want to, but he had to remember and respect that God was infront of him, even if he was a can of Pepsi. Kenny wiped some tears and stood up.

"Kenny, my son...stop your bloody bitching!" said God, with Kenny shocked at the comment. "Do you have any idea how many people pray to me everyday? Do you have any idea how hard it is to answer EVERY prayer that comes to me and try to keep people happy? No, you don't! My son, each person, when they are born, have a gift...a gift of life, that is all I can do to make sure people, when born are treated fairly...but most of the time, it is you, the people, who make your own choice...the reason you are poor is because your parents descided to choose that road, I didn't say they should...but if they are happy, should you be in the way of that?"

"But...I'm unhappy with my lifestyle..." said Kenny, sadly.

"Kenny, you have a whole life ahead you, you are just nine afterall...it only takes one single thing to change...when the time comes, your life will change. You can't always rely on me, you have to make something of your life yourself. You must go to IT, than it come to you..."

"But, God...why do I die all the time? You haven't answered me that yet..."

"Kenny, this gift you have, is not as bad as it seems...you keep coming back, do you not?"

"Well, yeah...I guess..."

"Then why complain? Your the only person in this world to have this. I picked you because, I believed you could make something of yourself, there are very rare gifts in this world and this one is rare...and already you haven't exploted it, which means your a child of no greed, you didn't want to make any money from it, you thought you were being punished but your not, believe me. Your just a experiment. A flawless one. Those who don't deserve to live, will die and never come back. Those who come to heaven, are those who I believe are good people and will be worthy of a place in my perfect world heaven...and one of these days, when you are ready, you are more than welcome". Explained God.

Kenny who was still staring at the can of Pepsi, slowly smiled.

"You mean I'm not dead...this time...?"

"Was you ever?"

"I understand now...I should be lucky..." said Kenny. "T-Thank you, God, thank you for showing me the light..."

"Not a problem, my child, I will send you back to your body"

Kenny smiled and ighed with happiness.

"One more thing, Child" said God. "Do me a favor?"

"Sure, anything God, anything for you!" said Kenny.

"Don't drink coke...drink Pepsi and don't forget to try the Pepsi Max, no added colors and no sugar!"

Kenny blinked a couple of times and nodded. "Uh...sure..."

"Oh and kick Cartman in the nuts, I have a reputation..."

"Done deal!" smiled Kenny.

"And DVD players...? Ha, that was so ten years ago, it's all about Blue-ray now and soon I'm sure you'll get one.

"Wow cool" said Kenny. "Thanks once again, God..."

"Peace be with you, child!"

And with that, the glow from the Pepsi came towards Kenny and surrounded him, it was beautiful for those short few seconds and then blackness again covered his eyes.

Kenny felt something heavy on him, that was the first thing before he sucked in some air. Kenny took a huge breath and pushed this heavy object that was on top of him off. With ease he pushed the cross off him and the people around him gasped and came to his aid. Though Stan and Cartman were hardly that suprised. Stan and Cartman, pushed their way through to get to their friend.

"Dude, that was awesome!" cheered Stan.

Kenny laughed with his friend.

"Oh God, Kenny, man I was real worried..." said Cartman. "I was, like, 'oh no...Kenny's dead, oh God no...' Man, you had me worried sooo much! Shame you don't have any DVD's, I'd be happy enough to take them off your hands if you had some...but then if you did, your parents would probably sell them for vodka and crack..." laughed Cartman.

Kenny frowned and then kicked Cartman in the balls.

"OWW!!" screamed Cartman.

"This was from God!" Kenny kicks Cartman again. "This is for me!" Kenny kicks Cartman again. "And this one is just for fun!!" Kenny made the last kick huge, the pain so unbearable it made Cartman cough up abit of blood.

"Wow, awesome, you made Cartman cough blood" said Stan, patting Kenny on the back. But Kenny didn't answer back and instead just walked out of the church. Their was silence until Cartman spoke.

"M-My balls...waa-haa...(Crying)...my beautiful b-balls ahhh-haaa owwww...!!" struggled Cartman.

It was a few hours later and Kenny was sitting outside his house, on the steps but also throwing pebbles at the stray dogs. Stan, Kyle and Cartman were walking up to him.

"Hey, dude" said Stan.

"Hi guys..." said Kenny.

"Dude, I heard what happened at your church" said Kyle. "It sounded kinda cool, but it must suck dying all the time..."

"No, no it doesn't...because I've learn something today..." said Kenny. "I've learnt that I should be happy with what I've got because ironiclly life is too short, I'm happy with the lifestyle I've got and must remember that people have it worse than me...I don't have to have a DVD player or have money to be happy because...I AM happy, I've got family and friends like you guys..."

"Kenny, that is so gay...!" said Cartman.

"I'm just saying, enjoy what you've got and be happy..." said Kenny.

Just then Kenny's mum and dad were carrying something that looked expensive.

"Hey son, look what we've got!" said his dad.

"What?" said Kenny.

"Your dad stole a flat screen TV and a Blue-ray DVD player from a lorry!" said his mum.

"WHAT?" Shouted Cartman.

"Wow, cool!" said Kenny

"Come on, son, help me set it up!"

"Sure" said Kenny, getting and going inside but then turned around to his friends. "Hey, Cartman!". Cartman looked at him angrily and jealous. "You can shove your DVD player up your ass!!" Then Kenny flipped Cartman the bird.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!!" shouted Cartman.

Kenny started laughing but before going inside, one of the slating from the roof fell off and impaled into Kenny's head, with a shudding thud, Kenny backed off before falling off his steps and died. The slate still sticking out of his head and the blood pouring out slowly into the snow.

"Oh my God!" said Stan. "Kenny, has a Blue-ray DVD player!"

"YOU BASTARD!!!" said Cartman.

**THE END!**

**It was a rubbish ending and yes, I did rush it. Still, I hope you like it.**


End file.
